My boobs were my tools of the trade for almost 20 months.

Once my youngest daughter weaned herself from the Magical Boob Juice, the fun really began!

(And by fun we all know I mean chaos!)

Pull up a chair, sit a while, read a few pages.

Keep and open mind and a joyful heart and you too can get pumped into the world of The Milk Maid.



My To-Do List For Today:

  1. Do a "quick thaw" of the turkey since MOTHER forgot to put it it fridge to thaw this past weekend. A quick thaw is where you put the bird in a big bucket, fill the bucket with water, weight bird down (so the little jackleg doesn't float away) and s-l-o-w-l-y allow water to run from tub faucet into bucket and overflow s-l-o-w-l-y back into the tub and down the drain. Everything seems slow about a quick thaw except the actual time it takes to work.
  2. Bake a Pecan Pie. Because Jef loves them. And I love Jef. And that's the way I roll, homey.
  3. Figure out how in Pete's name to make a Pecan Pie by calling favorite aunt.
  4. Bake cornbread for dressing. (Doesn't she mean stuffing?). No I don't mean stuffing. Stuffing is evil. Dressing is cooked in a pan away from the salmonella filled cavity of the turkey. It's a Southern thing.
  5. Bake (read as "buy") biscuits for dressing. It's so much easier to buy 4 biscuits. And I was going to Micky D's for coffee anyways.
  6. Once turkey is thawed, make a brine for the bird and let soak (keeping at a safe temperature, of course) over night. (Why do you brine the bird?). I brine the turkey to keep it moist during cooking and because "sawdust" is not an adjective I wish to use for the texture and taste of my turkey. I am the Turkey Cooker Of The Family. It's a lofty title I plan to keep until I can pass the torch to some young apprentice.
  7. Explain to my mother One More Time what a brine is and how a brine works. Make a drawing so the whole osmosis thing doesn't blow her mind. Again.
  8. Grate the cheddar and Gruyere cheese for homemade Mac-N-Cheese.
  9. Wash all dishes, put away all dishes, and have kitchen spotless for tomorrow's cooking whirl wind!

--The Milk Maid says Turkey Day RAWKS!! and then does her best impersonation of Wayne and Garth. (Not Newton and Brooks either people!)

If my mother behaves this holiday season I might poke her in an old f'er farm with this: assisted living software.


kittenroar5 said...

Call me when you figure out that pecan pie. I'll be doing it as well. :)

singletracey said...

Sounds GOOD! Got room for one more over there ;-)

B said...

doodle lee doo, doodle lee on Wayne! I am sure the turkey will be GREAT! What's a brine?

Milk Maid said...

Pecan Pie: 1 c. sugar, 3 eggs, 1 c. light Karo syrup, 2 tbsp melted butter, 6-6.5 oz pecans, unbaked pie shell (9"). Bake at 350 for 55-60 min, let cool for 2 hours!

kittenroar5 said...

yea! thanks!

B said...

hey!! the old f'er farm was mine!! i'll let you borrow it though..cuz i like you. BUT..nobody else!

Michell said...

I'm totally with you on the dressing as opposed to stuffing. The idea of sticking part of my food up a turkeys ass just doesn't work. The brine thing sounds interesting. Does it flavor the turkey at all? Have fun with your cooking and oh, could you send me a dish of the mac-n-cheese?? Please??

kittenroar5 said...

Where are you?