My boobs were my tools of the trade for almost 20 months.

Once my youngest daughter weaned herself from the Magical Boob Juice, the fun really began!

(And by fun we all know I mean chaos!)

Pull up a chair, sit a while, read a few pages.

Keep and open mind and a joyful heart and you too can get pumped into the world of The Milk Maid.


No Oompah In My Loompah

I'm trying to study flash cards and do some book work, but my brain seems to be either out of gas (insert your favorite fart joke here) or has malfunctioned to the point that I will never be able to concentrate on anything (other than blogging or sex) for more than 10 seconds at a time.

On a different note, no one (except Kat at BB) has had ANY suggestions for my 300th post. "I'm terribly disappointed!" she said scoldingly. Then she sloughed away and sulked in a corner and had lots of coffee and got over it. Mostly.

Zeus didn't eat any of the other doggies at our class. In fact, he was very well behaved and did everything I asked him to do. He won the Dog of the Night Award, which means he got a chew toy, which means that he now loves Trainer Woman much more than he loves me. Everyone was afraid of Zeus at first- one lady said "Oh My God don't let him eat me!". Never missing a chance to be a smart ass I countered with, "He only eats lean meat, lady!"... I'm damn glad I wore my Bitch Shoes to class.

Ava is still sick. I still have snotty boobs. She's added a new trick to her repertoire: When she's nursing she will get frustrated because she can't breathe from her nose so she bites me. Then I yelp, then she laughs, then I take the boobs away, then she screams, then my eyes pop out of my head. It's actually pretty funny... at least that's Jef's take on the whole deal. I remind him that he will nod off to sleep sometime...

Emoticon - Kung Pow
--The Milk Maid says chicka de china the chinese chicken!


B said...

B said...
Maybe you should write about the up and coming mamu?

ehh hemmm! I did make a's not a great suggestion..but it's a suggestion.

The Milk Maid said...

You DID say that... but I thought that was a seekrit?!?! Are we not secreting now? No one has informed me as of late :|

Kathy said...

I am rather impressed with your unique abilities to train animals in those rather tricky shoes. My my. That is impressive.

Ethansmama said...

I should have made a suggestion, but honestly this last week and all the shit that has hit. I just passed it by, along with your fabulous award. So sorry about that. I really did appreciate receiving it. I just had no clue how to link it on my blog. Guess I am a dummy sometimes.

Marcy "meg" said...

I am not very creative when it comes to that kind of stuff (the 300th post thing), please don't hate me!

Glad Zeus is doing well in class!

Michell said...

Sorry about the bites. Hope Ava is less plugged up soon. oh and loved your come back to the lady at the dog class. oh and sorry about the lack of input on the 300th blog thing. I'm just not creatively minded lately.