My boobs were my tools of the trade for almost 20 months.

Once my youngest daughter weaned herself from the Magical Boob Juice, the fun really began!

(And by fun we all know I mean chaos!)

Pull up a chair, sit a while, read a few pages.

Keep and open mind and a joyful heart and you too can get pumped into the world of The Milk Maid.


The Super Large Clinic Site Is Mine, ALL MINE!

I am officially employed (pending my background check and drug screen)!

I have negotiated a salary, filled out all the needed paper work, peed in a cup, and sworn under oath (metaphorically speaking) that I am not a crook. I even resisted the urge to do my best Richard Nixon impression when I signed the background check form.

I am a phlebotomist! I am a phleb at the place I wanted to be a phleb! I am so cool today that, if I didn't have a rollicking headache from skipping breakfast so I could go put the finishing touches on everything at the Super Large Clinic site, I would do some crazy dance and upload it here for you all to make fun of!

It feels good- lemme tell ya! I went to school, got an edumakatshon, and then I got a JOB. It's so storybook I know, but that's about the only thing in my life that's gone according to plan. The plan took a lot of time (2 months from putting my application in), but who the heck am I to complain. I don't have to be a waitress now. There will be no serving booze to old men who look at my tatas. Well, unless I want to do that.

My intro to venipuncture teacher even called me to congratulate me! Even my mom was proud!

And speaking of my mother, she made a great effort to be nice yesterday... She asked if "my friend" (she can't remember My Pal B's name) was in "any of that big weather that hit" meaning Hurricane Gustav. I'm putting a great big gold star by my mother's name alongside the E for effort.

And on a side note: Has anyone ever heard of the "3 days and $75 method" for potty training? Basically you take 3 days, add in one completely nekkid toddler, mix well in a confined area with a sprinkle of a training potty and let stew. At the end of 3 days you are supposed to have a potty trained kiddo. And the $75 is for?... Carpet cleaning of course! I'm thinking of giving this a whirl. Ava keeps ripping off wet diapers and telling us before she poops, so I'm thinking she's ready. Now the question remains, "Is mama ready?". Mama may need some new home furniture after this.

--The Milk Maid says I'm gonna poke everybody!


Aunt Becky said...

Oh, congrats, Milk Maid! Totally awesome news!

Heidi said...

Congrats on making your dream come true!!!!

battynurse said...

Yay on the job!!!! I'm so glad you got it. Good luck with the potty training.

Dory said...

Congrats, woman!

Anonymous said...

Woo hoo! Go Vampire!!!

And I think Ava will train when Ava wants to train. She might be taken in for 75 in ice cream though!


Montana's mom said...

Woo hoo congrats on the job! Also if you can get Ava potty trained in 3 days let me know how!

B said...

it almost made me tear up when your mom asked about me. i think they know now that their daughter is safe when she comes to visit me in TX!

twondra said...

Congrats! I'm so happy for you! I wish I lived in Georgia so you could poke me...hehe. :)

Marcy "meg" said...

I know we already texted.. but wanted to tell you again congrats on the job!!!! You go girl!

babybound said...

Yay for you!!! It seems like that all went by so fast? Maybe not to you?

Good job Mom for remembering that MM has a friend that lives in hurricane paths. Even more gooder for calling to check up on her. Yay Mom!!