My boobs were my tools of the trade for almost 20 months.

Once my youngest daughter weaned herself from the Magical Boob Juice, the fun really began!

(And by fun we all know I mean chaos!)

Pull up a chair, sit a while, read a few pages.

Keep and open mind and a joyful heart and you too can get pumped into the world of The Milk Maid.


1st Birthday Party Ideas?

Let's face it, parties don't plan themselves people.

I'm trying to think of a nice, pleasant, low-stress way to have a great big FUN first birthday party for Ava... and you are going to help me (right?!).

There is no way in hell- to put it ever so kindly- that I will allow my whole "fam-damily" inside my house for a party (ever again). I'm leaning towards taking it all outside. We have a huge front yard and a pool (well, the pool is really at mom's but I can see it from here) so I'm thinking perhaps a Hawaiian/Tropical Themed Pool Party?


  • Pool = cool!
  • Mom and Dad have 2 grills
  • Dad loves to burn- I mean cook- food
  • Tiki Torches are cheep (and what's a kid's party without fire?)
  • Garden hose clean up


  • No spiking the kiddie punch for early nap time allowed
  • I would have to be blitzed to put on a bathing suit in front of people
  • The children in my family make parties so much LESS fun
  • The parents are much worse than their children

Any other cute outside themed party ideas? Anyone... Anyone?!

Party favor ideas:

  • Sand pail and shovels
  • Bucket of sand
  • Pet gold fish for all the kids!
  • Custom t-shirts or personalized cups
  • Baking soda and vinegar volcano

Wow, that's a pretty good start. Any other ideas that you can think of for a crowd of 30+ ranging in age from 1 to 78 would be totally appreciated (especially if the idea helps pay back all those well meaning relatives who bought toys that clack, whistle, clink, and whooowhooo at ungodly hours of the night all by themselves!).

--The Milk Maid says, "You've got to be smarter than what you're messing with!".


Estella's Moms said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Estella's Moms said...

I'll try to think of some suggestions. Just don't forget your flask.

journey of two FL mommies said...

you absolutely crack me up :) i love your blogs!! good luck with the party ;)

Michell said...

Ok the bucket of sand could be a disaster if all the sand ends up in the pool. Otherwise it sounds like a good idea. I like the idea about the spiked punch too although maybe I wouldn't share. It would maybe be much easier to deal with the fam if you're drunk and they're not??

kittenroar5 said...

T had a huge beach themed party for number one. We had mini pools with sand with shells, "beach" volleyball... nets... I can't remember everything, but everyone had fun. I think you so have a great idea!

B said...

I have a flask (skull and crossbones on the front), can I come to the party? How about if I promise to do a cannon ball when your least favorite relative walks by?

Anonymous said...

I am struggling to come up with great ideas for Doran's 1st, so no inspiration to share. Sounds like you have a great head start though. I love the idea of a tropical themed birthday party, and I'm crazy enough to vote for pet goldfish as party favors, too. I just like the idea. Good luck!